Just In Case You Fostered A False Hope
I AM 16% EMO!  Okay... so I'm not emo at all.. I am probably not even goth, because goths are just messed up emo kids... I am probably a metal head... or into boy bands... |
Okay, now that I've gotten the obligatory useless, baseless, and time consuming quiz out of the way, let's move on. I'm kind of disappointed that the only one writing here recently is me, and more so that I've been writing so goddamned much. What is that? It all came from fucking sleeping too much. ARGH.
So I guess Samantha has been real mysterious about telling Katy who is interested in her. I don't get that. She knows who I am, and I'm sure it's not even a shock. If there's anything I've learned from past experience, it's that blowing up small stuff like this accomplishes nothing. I could just call her and tell her, "Hey, enough of the dramatic bullshit or whatever has been going on. Just calling to say that it's ME who likes you, and if you're interested at all great, but if you aren't interested or whatever that's totally fine too. I'd like to at least be your friend again though, as we've lost touch and you're a cool person. BOSS!" and then hang up. Problem is I don't know her phone number and I won't take it from Samantha. I don't think that's right. If I were just interested in like being friends or whatever then it would be different (and if it comes to that it will be different), but in my mind if you show interest in someone, the only person you should get their phone number from is them.
On top of that I hear things about a boyfriend or an ex-boyfriend or a bouncer or an assassin or a really angry Buddhist monk, and I don't really care about that either. I've grown tired of being childish about things; if they're serious, more power to them. If they are on the rocks or whatever, let them work out their troubles. I'm not going to take advantage of a situation like that. Like I've hinted at in previous posts, people should not edge into something to fill someone else's hole, but rather because both people are....ACTUALLY INTERESTED. If they don't work out, that's too bad, and if she's interested, we'll see what happens...I don't know. You know what I'm trying to say.
But if you don't, I'm just trying to express here that I'm tired of childish melodrama. Yes, I've been guilty of it more than a little myself in the past, and I'd like to move on from it, with or without Katy. Sure I have my character flaws, tenedency towards being an asshole being the chief, but I think that's really because of how things have been going recently. I mean, the whole Alyssa thing just wore me out. I'm sorry if I've offended you in the past, just as I'm sure you're sorry if you've offended me, so let's just move on. I'm ready to grow again as a person, and if someone should share that experience with me, great, I am thrilled. But if not (for now at least), that's fair too. All this bullshit atmosphere has put a lot of ridiculous stress on me and I'm tired of it. Let's be real from now on, shall we?
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